Monthly Archives: December 2014

Life – the Advent of disgusting convenience foods

life so gross pg 2 - mar 8 1937

Yes, the “racy” flavor of foreign lands. And what foreign land, pray tell, are we discussing? Italy? Worms in a can are not spaghetti, even if it does say it on the label. The precursor to Hamburger Helper – Van Camp’s provides you the sauce and the “pasta,” such as it is, but you still have to buy your own meat and cook it. If you’re going to that length to brown some hamburger, you might as well put on a pot of water to boil and make your own spaghetti!

–March 8, 1937

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Mary Anne Saves the Day (and then hides under the bed), Part Three

Mary Anne tries to finagle later curfews, but no dice. This makes her ponder responsibility. Was she being irresponsible because she didn’t call her father to tell him she would be five minutes late? And what about the club? Mary Anne decides that she is going to be the one to fix things – that will be responsible. And take lots of courage. Methinks a visit to the Wizard is in for her.

Mary Anne ponders writing a note to Kristy. In the meantime, Dawn calls and Mary Anne invites her over. They go through Mary Anne’s dad’s high school yearbook to see old pics, and discover that Dawn’s mom and Mary Anne’s dad dated in high school. When they look through Mrs. Schafer’s yearbook later, they also find a dried rose pressed between the pages. Awww. As twelve-year-old girls are wont to do, they tear this subject to bits – what did they mean by “just one more summer?” And why “love is blind?” All of this distracts Mary Anne from The Plot to Put the Band BSC Back Together.

And then, Mary Anne sits for Mr. and Mrs. P. Jenny acts weird and Mary Anne wonders what’s up. The kid feels hot-blooded, so Mary Anne checks it to see. A fever of one-hundred-and . . . four! Mary Anne tries the P’s phones (which obviously is a modern edit – none of these people would have had a cell in the 80s). Mary Anne can’t reach anyone, so she calls Dawn. Dawn comes over and suggests calling 911, and they send an ambulance. The girls make phone calls, and bundle Jenny up, and they all ride together to the hospital. The doctor diagnoses strep throat.

Jenny’s parents come and Mr. P drives Mary Anne and Dawn home, and even pays Dawn, complimenting them both on their level-headedness. Mary Anne invites Dawn over and they look through old photos, right in view of Kristy (whose bedroom can see into Mary Anne’s, if you remember). Dawn catches on to the game and is understandably upset. She leaves, and Mary Anne cries into her pillow.
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Mary Anne Saves the Day (and then hides under the bed), Part Two

Claudia’s grandma, Mimi, opens the door, so this is a Bad Sign. Kristy doesn’t show. Business is stiffly conducted, along with faces made and sarcastic comments. Mary Anne waves on leaving the house, though, and, encouraged by Claudia’s return wave, gives the note she has written to Mimi. At home, Mary Anne calls Claudia, and is stiffly forgiven. Mary Anne and Claudia discuss the future of the BSC, and Mary Anne promises to talk to Kristy, which . . . good luck with that, little chicken.

Mary Anne attempts accosting Kristy the next day at school. Kristy is haughty and says she doesn’t have to go to meetings because it’s HER club. Buh? Her compromise is taking turns in Claudia’s room, answering the phone and offering jobs to the others only if the girl on deck cannot take them herself. Isn’t that what started the trouble in the first place?

In the meantime, Dawn comes up and Mary Anne invites her over for Saturday. She gets the reaction from Kristy that she’s seeking. But then, Kristy tells Mary Anne that she can now stay out until 10 p.m. on weekends, which makes Mary Anne the only one in the club who has to be home early.

Mary Anne does her first lone shift at the next BSC meeting, and takes a job for the Prezziosos. She tells us that Mrs. P is very fussy, and likes things just so – like Mary Anne’s own father, it seems – and the kid is just . . . well, not. Her mom dresses her in frilly clothes. Mary Anne has a painting book, and the kid spills water on herself, and Mary Anne cleans it up with a problem. I’m surprised to see mention of Colorforms in here! Are those still a thing? According to Amazon, they are! Holy childhood flashback, Batman!
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