Fifty Shades Dumber, Chapter Eight.

Chapter Eight. A whole lot of drama for nothing. Grey has many religious paintings. Do we care? Grey puts her to bed, and this time that doesn’t mean to fuck. Ana hallucinates other people in the room, which coexists well with her multiple personalities. Grey is on the phone with Elena (Mrs. Robinson), ordering her to stay away from Ana. He worries that something could happen to her (Ana), because of him. She undoes his shirt, which scares him. She invites him to bed. The balcony door is open, which she did not do. Ana tells him about her “hallucination.” Grey spirits Ana away. A new car will arrive soon. It’s the car he buys all of his subs, apparently. Does he have a subscription service? Or a punch card?

Finally Ana asks the question about why he thought she’d leave if his shrink spilled the beans. Tell me, gentle readers, would you not be uneasy with a man who replies, “You cannot begin to understand the depths of my depravity . . . And it’s not something I want to share with you?”

Apparently, Elena lied when she said she saw Grey a week prior. But Grey could be lying, too. Ana tells Grey that Grey, Senior told her about his mutism, which irritates him. They hole up in a ritzy hotel and have lots of sex.

Dr. Greene comes to the hotel, and lectures Ana about neglected birth control. She gives Ana a pregnancy test. Ana seems to be SHOCKED that she could be pregnant. How fucking dumb are you?? Considering how often you have sex . . . This floors her so much, she becomes insular, until Grey coerces her to spill. He’s relieved she’s not pregnant, but . . . in an off-hand way. Distant, almost. It was your dick, buddy.

They shower, and Grey wants her to wash off the lipstick still on his body. He tenses and stands in fear as she tries to stay in the green-lighted areas. And she cries. And he’s not worthy! He’s not worthy! Did you wander on the set of Wayne’s World?

But he loves her. As if that makes up for everything. And I guess for dirrpy little Ana, it does. Not only that, he doesn’t actually say the word. She says, “You love me,” and he replies, “Yes. I do.” Small victories and all that rot, I guess.


1 Comment

Filed under romance novel

One response to “Fifty Shades Dumber, Chapter Eight.

  1. “Grey has many religious paintings.”

    The Birth Of Man, This Book Sucks.

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