Monthly Archives: December 2012

Fifty Shades Dumber, Chapter Seven.

Chapter Seven. She fondles him during the rest of the bids. They’re going to leave to take care of things, but Mia, Grey’s sister, drags Ana away to some other auction. Is he going to sell her now? It’s for their first dances, apparently. Ana’s Multiple Personality Disorder kicks in, and different Anas argue over stupid shit. Ana finds out from Mia that Grey was always fighting in his teen years, and was expelled twice. It stopped when he was fifteen. “Another piece of the jigsaw falls into place.” Wow, you’re so smart. Not.

Grey bids $10k for a dance with her. But he has a counter-bid with some mystery man. Grey’s final bid is $100,000. Seriously? He takes her out the back way and up to his old bedroom. And then he spanks her, as requested. And then they fuck. And she is “spiraling into a healing orgasm that . . . wrings me out” (like one of those Libman mops?) “and leaves me spent and breathless.”

There’s a picture of a woman on his corkboard. She is “no one of consequence,” according to Grey. Victim #1, perhaps? So, why is she there? More stupid secrecy that really has no play. Continue reading

Advertisements

1 Comment

Filed under romance novel

Fifty Shades Dumber, Chapter Six.

Chapter Six. Wait, still fucking. It’s the same as always – he’s violent to her nips, he touches her “sex,” et cetera. She watches him “come apart” under her. Shall we call all the king’s horses and men now, or do you want to wait? Ana enjoys herself – “this is what he does so well.” Sure, at the expense of other things that might be more important. She “counter[s] his rhythm in perfect symmetry.” What does that even mean? You’re bouncing around up top – that’s all we need to know (or, rather, I don’t wanna know ANY of it, but anyway).

“I come audibly, exhaustingly, spinning down and around.” Sounds like it might be your inner ear – maybe you should see a doctor about that. He tells her she’s beautiful, but she doesn’t believe him. He lists all the guys he’s seen that are hot for her. He emphasizes that she’s his. You are just scary, man; there’s no need to keep saying this much. Sign of insecurity.
Continue reading

Leave a comment

Filed under romance novel

Fifty Shades Dumber, Chapter Five

Chapter Five. Ana confirms with the receptionist that it is Elena (Mrs. Robinson). She’s co-owner of the salon. Ana watches them talk, which makes her angrier. She tells Grey she wants to leave. He took all of his subs there, so Mrs. R has met all of them. But Ana is the only one who knows who Mrs. R really is. He does manage to see how fucked-up this is, so perhaps there is hope for him yet? He thinks she’s running away, but she just wants a haircut without baggage.

Grey gets a phone call. He says a bunch of mysterious things. Casperella left her husband and was with a guy who was recently killed in a car crash. So, grief is probably why she’s gone crazy. Anyway, he tries to change the subject and Ana wants to talk about Mrs. Robinson. Grey says they can, back at his place. Nope, that’s code for “fuck you until you forget.” She still wants a haircut, so Grey decides to have the stylist come to his place. He claims it’s to keep her safe from Casperella, and if she won’t come willingly, he will drag her. HOW is this sexy or fun? She taunts him, and that makes him throw her over his shoulder, and give her a swat on the ass. In the MIDDLE OF THE STREET, no less! Our house, it has a paddle.

Ana is angry about many things: the fireman’s carry, his stupidity about choice of salon, his crazy exes, his knowing her bank account number, and making her stay with him. I thought you wanted the latter, though!! She thinks something’s changed with Casperella. She gets Grey to spill that Casperella has a concealed weapons permit. Ana helpfully points out, “That means she can just buy a gun.” Yes, indeed, instead of tap-dancing or whoring for it, she can just fork over cash and buy one. Also, a “concealed weapons permit” gives you license to carry, not necessarily buy one guaranteed. I know E.L. FudgeJames is not from the States, and laws are different in the UK, but Google is available worldwide, as is Wikipedia.
Continue reading

1 Comment

Filed under romance novel

Fifty Shades Dumber, Chapter Four

Chapter Four. Grey rubs noses with her, pinning her arms down. He pleads for her not to leave again, then calls her “wench” and wants her to cook. He finds the balloon in her bed, probably thinking she does kinky things with it.

They eat and talk about Ana’s family. He wants to take care of her – creepy when he says it. She’s mad he bought the publishing company. Grey tells her not to tell anyone, as it’s not official. She asks if he’d buy the next company if she left, and he would. It must be nice to have all this money to screw around with.

He asks if he can stay over, and she assumed that he was. Banter. Sarcasm. He gets out the ice cream, and takes her to the bedroom with its “insipid light.” Were you going for “dim bulb” in the thesaurus? He ties her to her bed, then feeds her some ice cream. He says that he could always force-feed her, to ensure she eats. That sounds like something a cannibal might say, before he fattens you up for his Christmas feast. Are you going to cook and eat her, like that cop was planning to do with who knows how many women?
Continue reading

1 Comment

Filed under romance novel